Monday, September 15, 2014

Being Open

After reading my reflection comments at the end of my last post, my fiancé decided to pay special attention to me and my derrière during the nights of our weekend.  He and I have been in previous relationships and we both know where things end up when one side goes too long with feeling unfulfilled or unsatisfied.  He was glad that I was able to recognize what I was feeling and voiced it, but he was still hurt that I started to feel that way especially since it was very unintentional on his part.  I felt proud of myself for not keeping it in (given my past experience with my lack of open communication) yet at the same time guilty for bringing it up because I knew how it would make him feel. 
On Friday night, we talked about it a lot while I was spending time over his knee lovingly receiving the same paddle that I couldn't handle the previous night. I told him the feelings of unfulfillment only started occurring recently and that I really do understand that we can't be all in it every night.  We also talked about what had actually happened during and after the previous paddling.  I hadn't realized it at the time, but he explained to me that he was more than willing to continue the scene by slowing down and reducing strength.  Instead, it was really because of my sense of feeling rushed that we stopped and moved on to sex.  I did it because I thought he wanted to go relax and he did it because he thought I really wanted to stop.  That's when I asked him, "If you were okay with continuing, then why didn't you just take control?" 
He paused, and then replied with, "I guess I honestly thought you were ready to stop and didn't want to keep going.  You were also right - I was tired and ready to relax.  I didn't really feel like playing, but that doesn't mean I won't try to do it for you anyway." 
I said, "Yes, but the problem was that I could tell you didn't want to and I don't want you to do something that you don't want to do.  I mean a couple of weeks ago you were already in bed when I asked you to spank me.  You rolled out of bed and delivered very well with the cane.  It was amazing and aside from me knowing that you were tired, I couldn't tell that you didn't want to do it.  But, last night, I could tell with every swat that you weren't into it.  The words were all there but the delivery just wasn't the same." 
He said that he undertsood and apologized.  Then, he proceeded to give me a mix of the paddle and the shorter cane.  We talked and joked a bit more as he decided whether or not I was being sassy.  I'm glad he decided on sassy!  He pulled my pants down and my panties up to expose my cheeks. He continued with the paddle and even some with his hand.  I was already pretty excited when he started to let his fingers wander lower while he was rubbing the punished area.  It certainly wasn't long before I was well ready to be taken.  He stopped spanking and got undressed before entering me from behind.  He paused while we both enjoyed the suddeness of our coupling.  Then, we let our primal instincts take over and he roughly reminded me that I am his to love, his to take, and his to cherish.  He is my man and I am his woman.

2 comments:

  1. Very sweet. Isn't good communication the best? :-) And you're right... it's not the same when our partners are clearly not into it. I'd rather go without, myself (even though that sucks as well). It's well worth waiting for when they are!

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  2. Erica - Thanks! Yes, good communication is wonderful. It's so difficult to find the "right" time to play because there is so much going on. It's also hard to set a certain day because who knows what will disrupt it. Just yesterday he ended up working 3 hrs longer than normal and I ended up having to change a flat tire by myself!

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